It's kind of weird when you are suddenly assigned to something, especially when you have no experience on it. And eventually you will start feeling stressed because you feel as if those seniors and the teacher-in-charge are always keeping an eye on you, and urging you to get things done quickly. Well, I'm not saying that that is not good or something. It is actually good, it trains us to be punctual and finish things in time. It's just that I kind of get depressed or maybe discouraged as my English level is not that well. If you ask me to read or even rewrite everything plus some of my ideas in Chinese, I would definitely do it without hesitations and it may even come out perfect. But for English, I need to use a lot of time just to make sure the other people and I do not make the same grammar mistakes. After that I have to correct it and it probably takes me another three to five minutes. See that differences between the two languages? Alright, to become a psychologist, I know I have to be very good at speaking and listening and not to mention, it is all English but not Chinese. That's why I have to train myself well with my English. I have to communicate using English well, write my English essays well, and can listen to different accents of English too. Wait a minute, it seems like I have been going too far from my topic. Okay let's get back there. Assigned to something that you are not very good at or what we gamer say, pro at. I never thought it would be a tough task to me, as I always thought I still have much time for everything that is going on in my life. I still have time to learn and adapt to another new situations or environments. Maybe I'm wrong, but there is possibilities that I'm right, right? So I have done my jobs, just to mention I have assigned to become a very lousy proofreader, don't ask me why. Alright, I guess it might be the comment that makes them to assign me that. Want to know my comment? The teacher-in-charge asked whether I can write, and I wrote there," Kind of I think. I am good at writing in English and better in Chinese." You can laugh, really, just laugh as loud as you want to. I know my level of "good" is not the same as yours. Now I'm not saying that I do not like this job, but what I'm saying is this is another tough one that I have to achieve in my life. I may not be as good or as perfect as my seniors think, but you know what my lecturer told me? Just know yourself, and be yourself. Do not lock yourself into the labeling cage as it is pretty hard to escape from that prison for a second time. He told our class some stories that really inspire me, and his class always encourages me to find myself and do something that I like. I love that a lot, to be honest that is my favorite subject in Foundation in Arts. So the problem now is, I have to go through this by constantly learning and growing at the same time. I couldn't request for changing group or anything right now since I'm just a newbie, but I shouldn't escape from this challenging task too. I shouldn't let myself to. My heart keeps asking me to flee, but my brain asks me to stay and face the pain because everything happens in our life for some reasons. I just done two proofreading just now, that was my first experience scanning those slideshows, words, sentences, and correct it with my own words. I hope those seniors didn't realize that, but soon they'll find out I think. But there is nothing to shame about, and that is why human has an ability to learn new things. I always told myself this, "I can accept failure, but I can't accept not trying." It is a quote from Michael Jordan if I'm not mistaken. Before we are experts in something, we have to do things from the very beginning and there is where I am now. Therefore, to make things go well, and to make the exhibition to be perfect, I will try my best to do everything. Although there is some disappointment when I know I couldn't be the Chinese-English translator of the cos-player, but I do think that everything happens for a reason. It may be a great opportunity for me to cope with the things that I have very little self-confidence. So, wish me good luck! I'd love to see a new leaf, oh wait, an entirely new me tomorrow. Good night.
Well after pouring out those negative feelings or emotions, I guess I have to find something that will bring my good mood back. And there is it, two of my favorite characters but I definitely love the one behind Rin, that is Sousuke Yamazaki. If you ask me the reason why, I would say I love his personality so much and his green eyes really attracts me. Let's have sweet dreams.
